Poker, I hardly know 'er

So there was a poker night this Saturday at AH's and the crafty old coot known as Rochester could not make it. Why? Because I went to a gun range for the first time! J-Biz came along with me, it was his first, too. It was awesome! I shot a Glock 9mm and .40, and a Taurus .38 Special. Much like sex was for the ladies, I was a little scared and it hurt the first time I shot the gun. But, just like sex is for the ladies, I couldn't get enough off it, and want to do it all day long! They had a handful of targets for the modern shooter. I took the one of a mustachioed dude in a knitcap, who was holding a lady hostage. When I got my aim on him. I yelled, "Let the bitch go, dirtbag!" Luckily, all everyone had on pretty good ear protection and I was the only one who heard. I pepper the scumbag's face and throat with numerous rounds. Two shots kind of got away from me, but the lady was fine. I think it only would have messed up her "Farrah hair". The more traditional target it this. What the hell is so menacing about this one? When shooting it I was thinking, "Sir! Sir! Please stand in a more masculine way or I will be forced to kill you." I just didn't get it. Also, all of you need to start saving up you dollars because Rochester is coming next time.