McSecond Round Pick

...So Josh McRoberts is leaving Duke. If anyone is keeping tabs, that is two big goofy white boys who never lived up to their top billing at Duke to leave in the past four years. McRoberts will get drafted, get a contract, and play for six years but never average double figures in any category. There. I said it. Let's look at the hard knocks life Josh is coming from. His family is living in abject poverty in Carmel, Indiana. They had to switch to the discount chlorine for their pool and his momma, who is smoking hot, had to but Y-rated tires on her Lexus GS430. I lived in Carmel. No one is poor in that town. I think elementary school teacher roll in 1970's Rolls Royces. But why would Duke be so supportive of him leaving? Hmmm, I wonder. BTW, NC State is going to be freakishly good next season. Prediction? Top 3 in the ACC. Top 15 in the NCAA. Not bad for an NIT team.

March Madness

We start the Sweet Sixteen tonight and being that I am a Bracketologist, I have pick 83% right for the first two rounds. I love this time of year. However, I also have come to hate some of the things this "Madness" creates. It creates stars out of role players. And, what's worse, it gives marginal first or second year coaches the title of being "hot". This year it is Anthony Grant. First off, beating Duke is not that big of a deal. If he had beat them in November, I might've raised an eyebrow. By March, Duke was shell of the team that Dick Vitale had painted on a nude boy. I think this Grant guy is a dick. I don't have any proof, but his court side mannerisms and the way he dealt with the press gave me that impression. I am sure that Michigan or Iowa or even Utah will be stumbling all over themselves to get him. They'll rally their alumni clubs for all the nickels and dimes they can get to give this guy a long expensive contract. All because his team went 28-7 and busted up a suck ass Duke team. 28-7 in the CAA? IN THE CAA! Yeah, let's look at the giants they dropped to:

• Xavier (a tourney team, not bad)
• Toledo (wha...)
• App. State (3rd in the Southern Confernce...yup.)
• Hofstra (well it was on the road)
• Old Dominion (Hey, didn't they retire Dave Twardzik's number?)
• Bradley (that was a BracketBuster. I guess it was busted)
• Pitt (it was a good loss, but still a loss)

My other favorite is when these "hot" coaches go on to say, "My heart is here. At UNC-Wilson" or "I am not interested in going to UCLA. My family and I are comfortable here at Mankota State." It is all of our natural desire to move up in the world. That's why I went back to college and graduated 9 and a half years later. That's why Matt is going to be a crude slick lawyer. That's why 3000 is going to get that graphics company off the ground. We need to advance in life. Staying in one place? I have never believed that. NEVER! Gregg Marshall was this first coach I have ever seen leave his program, get all teary eye while driving on the road and literally turn around.

I was at the College of Charleston during their NCAA glory years. I worked with the basketball team. We were ranked 16th in 1997 and 14th in 1999. We made it to three NCAA Tournaments in a row and beat Maryland and gave eventual champs, Arizona, a full 40 minute fight in 1997. The school had only been in D I for nine years. It was kind of big, but John Kresse had been coaching there for over two decades. There was talks of switching conferences from the Southern to the A-10. There were talks of a brand new arena, paid for my the Charleston tax payers. Then in 2000, College of Charleston stop going to the NCAA. They didn't even get a NIT bid. Now, College of Charleston hasn't made the NCAA in over six years and I kind of doubt, with Bobby Kremins at the helm, they ever will again. Where is the new arena? Nowhere. I can only imagine all the sh*t George Mason tried to get.

I'll be amazed if Anthony Grant is at VCU next year.

This is horrible

I was working last night and caught the trailer for a new horror flick, "Dead Silence". We had the sound off at work so I just saw the visuals. It looked hella scary. I mean, creepy long face old people and puppets....DAMN! It looked so good. Then, I got to imbd.com today and find out who is behind it. Its the writer/director of "Saw". For those of you not familiar with "Saw" and all the requisite sequels. Or as I like to refer to them, disappointing. I quickly went from excited to bored and then I got a little hungry and then I went back to bored again. I'll give this movie the benefit of the doubt, meaning I doubt it will be any good.

Shooting Ones Wad...

...I am afraid that is what Chuck Palahniuk did that. I just finished reading "Haunted". I don't have cable and don't have a real job, so I have taken back up recreational reading. FUN COME ALIVE! It was a fun read. But, one of my favorite books is "Fight Club". I have read it four times. Twice for school and twice for fun. It is great. It is also one of the few books I have read that is actually awesome to correspond with the movie. However, "Fight Club" was his first book. Chuck has written a dozen or so more books since then. "Haunted," while being fun, disgusting, weird, and spooky all at the same time, lacks something. It takes the guise of being a post-modern Canterbury Tales, but I never got that feeling from it. Palahnuik never take the voice of his story tellers. He keeps his own voice. His own voice is the voice of 30-something hipsters. You might be saying, "Rochester, that's only two books." Oh no my friends, I have read two of his shorts stories, one from an old GQ and another from Playboy. (I have had it since 2001, so I am actually starting to read these damn things!) Those two stories have the same problem. But, you know what? I am going to read "Choke" and "Survivor" because I want to believe that they won't have the same problems. I truly do.

Tim Hardaway is Gay!

I am getting so sick of this. Timmy hates gays. Okay, so he's an asshole. Do I really need 24 hour coverage on this. Let's also look at Timmy's career in a whole, or in his case, in an asshole. The lump sum of his career was spent in Golden State and Miami. Yup, no homosexuals there. There is a line in "The Simpsons" when Krusty realizes he is not Jewish. "All this time I thought I was a self-loathing Jew, but it turns out I am just an anti-semite." Think about it, Timmy, then dust off your disco pants and head on out to South Beach.

2007 is far from heaven...

I had an awesome 2006. It was awesome. That being said 2007 is 44 days old and is has been a royal shit storm. Let's recap:

1. Junkie former roommate sticks me for the entire month of January's rent. Sooper!
2. I find out that one of the loves of my imaginary live, Debra Morgan, is married. This is not entirely bad, because there was a 0% chance I could have had sex with her. However, her husband is ugly and looks to be roughly 10 years older than her. Also, her real last name is not Morgan. Its much more "ethnic".
3. Then, I find out my Grandma's dead.
4. They are closing King's and turning it into a parking deck.
5. I have not found a real job yet.
6. My girlfriend says our relationship has "plateaued" and "just wants to be friends".

2,3,4, and 6 all happened in roughly 72 hours. Looks like God remember He hated me again. Wow.

I am already tired...

...of hearing this stuff. It has been less than eight hours and I know I will hear this for 15 years. Big Mac didn't get the nod to go to Cooperstown. SHOCKING! He'll get in. Mark it (what a delicious pun). I don't understand this stigma of steroids in baseball. Shawn Merriman did them. Julius Peppers did them. Hell, Todd sauerkraut, a PUNTER, did them. And yet we hold them up to a different standard then Big Mac, Sosa, and Bonds. [NOTE: Dislike Bonds causes he is a dick, not because he does steroids.] Can someone please answer me on this? It makes no sense. Baseball did not outlaw steroids. So, these guys were doing nothing wrong. It is the same as the spitball or Ty Cobb stomping a handicapped fan. Well, maybe no that. Why is there a double standard? Oh, just so know one forgets, NBA players cannot test positive for cocaine or steroids, but can still smoke trees. That makes sense, too.

Hardcore Fantasy

So,, I am playing the top seed in fantasy this week in the playoffs. Well yesterday, Frank Gore went nuts and I still have either McGahee or Cadillac for the weekend. My question is this, "With the both of the Bears starting DT's out should I start Cadillac over Willis? Jeff, your answer will be ignored.

Was Nixon really all that bad? Pt. 2

So he secretly bombed Cambodia. That seems to be miniscule compared to what Cambodians do to other Cambodians. I am pretty sick, but even this is just wrong. How much do you think tickets were? I bet they were cheaper than going to the movies in America and you could still buy popcorn. On that note, was the Khmer Rouge even this bad?

CAKEWALK!

ACC rolled the Not so Big Ten...again. Even in the games the ACC lost, the Big Ten got embarrassed.

Chuck Amato No!

So, all the boo birds and typical North Carolina fickle fans got their way last night. Chuck Amato is fired. I have mixed feelings about the whole sitch. On one hand we potentially have an amazing team next season. We were young this season and no one really stepped up as a playmaker. I have a sneaking feeling that whoever NC State gets is going to go 7-4 next year and everyone will start to suck the stuff in their underpants zone. Saying things like, "See, Amato couldn't do it." I am 70% certain he could've done it. Then, the aforementioned fictional coach will go 6-5 and 5-6 and the whole damn thing will start over again.
Then again, this season was an all out embarrassment. The final loss to ECU was painful to sit through. We finished below UNC (they get the tie-break) and everyone knows that team was horrible. I actually got in a argument with some Anti-Amato douche at the end of the ECU game. My main argument is, "Who you gonna get?"

Monday Nitro Football

I wonder if ESPN will take a queue from NBC and do what people have been telling them to do and don't set the MNF schedule in stone at the end of the last season. Tonight is an awesome example of two reams not living up to anyone's expectations. 3rd and 4th in the NFC South does not a MNF game make. I love my Buccaneers, but the whole of the US of A does not have such a die hard love for the sole NFC Super Bowl Champions of the millennium. Have you seen what closes out the MNF season? Jets v. Miami! Wow, that will keep me from watching "Scrooged" or "KISS Saves Christmas"...NOT!

3000 in his post today brought up drafting as a head coach. As much as Gruden hates to develop young players (see the 2002 Oakland Raiders), he has put together some great draft classes in the past three years. We'll be 9-7 next year, and in the NFC South, that could win the division. Drew Brees is going to lose his arm. You read it here 1st, people.

Wii.T.F.!

So I am at the mall today. Typical Monday, just leafing through the new cargo shorts at Ambercrombie and Fitch. (BTW Why do they have to play that music so damn loud?) Then, I find myself at any of the 3 video game stores at the mall. I see a box for the new Nintendo Wii. Brand new it is $249. So, my Scottish heritage likes that. It doesn't have any really crazy bells and whistles, no DVD or Bluevein or whatever 3000 keeps rambling on about. What it does have is probably easily the most asinine controller design in the world. It's called the nunchuck and I am willing to bet dollars to donuts, if I buy this thing (which I won't) that it will wind up being smashed into a million pieces on my wall. PLEASE NERDS! Tell me what is up with this thing. I need to know.

1985

There has been a lot of talk about this season's Bears compared to the 1985 Monsters of the Midway. No one wants to admit that this season Bears might be better than the 1985 Chicago Bears. I'll admit that this season's Bears looks real good, but it is week 5. Let's not jump the gun just yet. 1985 was the first year I actually could consciously know that I started watching football. I was living in Indiana and because the Colts sucked and really had only been in Indianapolis for a short time I naturally was more drawn to the Bears. Chicago was my birth city and it was only 2 hours away from where I was. This is how little kids choose teams to root for. I made the big switch the day Tecmo Super Bowl came out and I got 6 sack with Eugene Marve. I have never looked back. What always stuck out was that sweater Ditka wore on the sidelines during that season. It was dressy, yet it screamed, "Oh we gonna make this happen!" at the same time. Well, last night I got my close-out special edition Eastbay catalog and bought this lil' beauty of less than $10. I am gonna look so classy at the Upper Deck this Sunday. I can't wait.

33!

Look who is number 33! Look out Wake!

T.O. is O.K.

So, it is official. As of 4:24 pm yesterday, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are on the clock. The worst part about the 24-21 loss to the Saints yesterday was that the offense for the Bucs looked really good. Gradkowski looked really good. He didn't screw up and Williams rushed for over 100 for the first time all year. Gradkowski is the QB that Gruden really wanted to run with the start the year anyway, so Simms might have to a clipboard to help him cover up that scar where his spleen used to be and the big bruise over his giant ego.
The defense looked old. Real old. I had not seen that many missed tackles and miscues for that defense since the 14 point Colts comeback in 2003. Oh and what cost us the game? A punt return by Reggie Bush for his 1st NFL TD. I mean, he didn't even have to make a move. How many game are we going to have to lose because we have awful special teams before someone finally fires Richard Bisaccia. He has no idea what he is doing or even worse how he is doing it.
With that game over I turned to the game of the week, Eagle v. Cowboys. It actually was a good game. Eagles defense looked scary. Their offense, however, was less than outstanding. What pissed me off (this is what you were all waiting for) was the way the annoucers kept try to put blame on T. O. for the woeful Cowboys offense. Um, no. One, I would never be coming to the defense of T.O. ever again, but no! The Cowboys have an old fart at QB. Just like they did last year. And the year before that. Oh, and the year before that. They haven't infused any youth at the QB position since they dropped a coked-up Quincy Carter quite some time ago. Drew Bledsoe, like a certain other someone in a certain town that rhymes with Green Gay, is done. He threw some balls that would make Chris Simms say, "Wow, that was a really poorly thrown ball." On what seemed like his 9th INT of the game, T.O. game off the line at 3/4 speed go past Lito Shepard and went to full speed. He was open by about 5 yards. Bledsoe threw it 5 yards short of T.O. It was horrible. Aikman starts in on T.O. for not coming of the line at full speed. Huh? He got open in a sea of 3 DB's, who cares how fast he came off the line? Just get the ball to him and that was a TD. Leave T.O. alone and start picking on Bledsoe. Wow, did I just say that?

London Blog

I know I have been bad on the blogging tip. I need to sit down and get my proverbial sheet together. So, until I can start posting my old school witt, here is an awesome story by my man, C. Monks.

Tommy Lawless...

...once said, "A fetish ain't a fetish if you do it everyday." These are words to live by, but Cousin Larry, this is ridiculous.

Tommy Lawless...

...once said, "A fetish ain't a fetish if you do it everyday." I am sure those are words to live by, but, Cousin Larry, this is ridiculous.

Bung?

I am not sure what a 'bung probe' is, but it is going to rock more that soccer.